If we realize that we should love ourselves more, yet no one teaches us how to do so, how can we begin to love ourselves? What can we do to feel better about ourselves?
Oftentimes, people have told me, “You love other people more than you love yourself.”
For a long time, I didn’t really understand what they meant until life taught me.
I used to prioritize everyone else’s needs before my own. If people needed something, I could deprive myself of something important just to make sure they were okay. I would stretch my own comfort, my time, even my resources, just to show up for them.
But here is what I began to notice: when the tables turned, they didn’t always do the same for me, not because they didn’t love me but because they prioritized themselves. If something wasn’t convenient for them or would hurt them in some way, they simply wouldn’t do it. Even if they had the capacity.
That was my turning point.
I realized that loving yourself means prioritizing your own peace, happiness and wellbeing without guilt. It’s not selfishness, it’s self respect. If you want something, if you are craving something, if you have the capacity to do it, do it. Buy that meal you have been craving. Take that trip. Book that spa session. Pamper yourself. Celebrate your wins, big or small.
Because here is the truth: people will treat you in the same regard you treat yourself. People are always watching even when you think they aren’t. If you treat yourself with respect, value and priority, others will mirror that. But if you treat yourself carelessly or nonchalantly, people will take their cue from you and treat you the same way.
And here is the other hard truth, if you keep prioritizing other people while leaving yourself behind, if you keep investing in the growth and development of others without investing in your own, those same people you worked so hard to help will eventually meet you at the stage you are and leave you there. They will meet you there and they will leave you there. It only takes people who are truly appreciative to look back and say, “This person has actually played a major role in my life and I need to be grateful for it.”
Now, I am not saying it’s bad to help people. I am not saying it’s wrong to lift others up. I am not saying you shouldn’t support or encourage growth in others. But while you are helping others climb, make sure you are climbing too. While you are pouring into others, make sure you are refilling your own cup.
So, treat yourself the way you want people to treat you. Show them through your own actions that you are worth love, care, and priority.
Loving yourself starts with small, intentional acts:
Listen to your needs before stretching for others.
Say “no” when something compromises your peace.
Reward yourself without waiting for someone else to do it.
Life is too short to deprive yourself of joy, peace and fulfillment. You owe yourself the same love, care and priority you give so freely to others.
I would really love to hear from other distinguish ladies of #hive, what about you? How do you practice loving yourself in your daily life?
