I am an abstract work of art ...

I have traces on the skin (surgeries), but also on the bones (chemotherapies) and above all on the soul, I have broken down and rebuilt myself so many times, that I continue to look for answers, in every possible way that allows me to continue healing in understanding the spiritual process bdeverything I have lived.

I remember that after my operation for breast cancer, I have been gradually letting go of fear..., the uncertainty, the pain. And although the body heals, there are moments when the soul shrinks from me, because there is an invisible link between fear and what I am no longer. Many times, I found myself clinging to the pain as if it were a way to let go of the impact, the intensity of what I had lived, as if healing took me away from that part of me that was wounded, but it was also brave.

It seems like a lie, but sometimes we don't want to heal, because the pain that breaks us, that sinks us into our shadow, is the only thing we have left of what we lost. Maybe we lost a parent, a story, a dream, or through illness a part of your body. And it is then that we cling to pain as if it were a great altar of what everyone believes, for example.

Why yes, we heal... what do we have left? And if you let go of the pain...
Does it feel like betrayal? Or maybe yes, we stop suffering, is it because we stop loving?...

What I learned from this very scary experience... That when we heal, we are not forgetting, it is also not denying what we have lived, healing is just giving pain a place, and then giving it peace.

Besides, when we stop cheating, nothing deceives us. It is definitely very scary to be yourself... Right? Perhaps, this is a decision that will come with more masks, masks.

To heal is not to betray oneself, it is to be grateful for life with all that it brings, even when it is scary, to move on.

I hope you never stop believing in what keeps your heart kind. Even when the world feels overwhelming.

Even when your path seems unclear. Even when others seem to be reaching their goals faster and more easily. Your dream was not meant to be rushed.

I'm still healing, it's an act of self-love, to say that I'm already well and enjoy, because life is a wonderful gift and we don't know when it's gone.

In addition to all that, I have been through an illness, which, like other oncology patients, has done them good, because only in this way, we become a new and better version.

Transit is life with people who love me, with my husband, children, family, friends, my students at the university where I work, in short, too many good things to complain about!.

Life deserves to be celebrated, even with our difficulties. We did not come to this earthly world to stay broken forever.

Janitze.☀️