That of assuming impossible relationships, fighting until you leave the skin just for that "not to fail in your relationship", is an absurdity.
We deserve happiness and we should always look for the relationships that best suit us. None is perfect, none will give you "total" happiness, but when you understand that a relationship where there is more crying than laughing or more fights than caresses must be ended, you get closer faster to the one that gives you much more growth, more happiness.
It is essential to understand that when you endure a bad love the only thing you say about yourself is that you do not think you deserve something better.
When you accept the abuse of your partner, in reality the one who abuses himself being in that hell, is you.
Do you know why? Because if they mistreat you and you allow it, let's be clear and excuse the frankness, you don't love yourself. In fact, as long as you endure a bad love, you lose the notion that there are good loves.
What to do about that?
Improve your self-esteem. Working on you. Cultivate your self-love. That's the feeling that will protect you from bad loves. The more self-esteem we have, the stronger we can be to get away from those we love, but in the end, they don't love us, they just use us and abuse our feelings.
On the other hand, with healthy self-esteem we will be able to be more objective about who we are, what we want for each of us, including our strengths and weaknesses, and the right we have to love and be loved. Do you realize that?
There is always fear behind change. There are truths that make you uncomfortable, but they need to be told.
The decision to choose oneself and, from there, to live in freedom, is often born from the darkest experiences, even when we hit rock bottom. When we live to please others, we become a hostage to the image we want to maintain. Wanting to be what others see in you, you end up not being able to express yourself or function freely.
Wanting to please does not even assure that the other will be happy with who you are and what you do. Maybe making all the changes in the world to those people is not enough.
When we believe in ourselves and in our abilities, nothing stops us and we are able to do even the seemingly impossible.
Last but not least and it is caused by prolonged stress and excess responsibilities, which leads to feeling lack of motivation, apathy, constant tiredness, irritability, and physical symptoms such as headaches and sleep problems. To recover, it is important to seek professional help if necessary, prioritize self-care to regain balance.
Janitze.🌷❣️
Separator made with Canva by @janitzearratia
Any images in this post are taken with my iPhone 12, the Infinix pro-note 30 or with the camera eighties Rolleiflex 2.8 f, and edited by me with Canva
Translation with |DeepL