Some days back, I was conversing with a lady, and I was surprised when she said she could walk up to anybody, both male or female, if she wanted to make friends. That’s totally different from my own lifestyle because I don’t think I have ever met someone physically and requested friendship. No! I allow it to happen naturally, and that’s the best for me. Although the case is slightly different when it comes to online interactions, I still don’t hit the nail by asking for friendship directly; I just allow things to flow, and along the line, if the person makes sense to my standard, we get on with mutual friendship.
But even though I allow things to flow in the process of becoming friends with anybody, I can fall out quickly too when I notice that things are not clear — and that’s one of the criteria I have for friendship.
My criteria for making and keeping friends are quite straightforward: let the flow be mutual, there must not be any parasitic behavior, and we are good to go. Once I notice the absence of flow, I withdraw myself immediately, and once I notice that the friend is becoming a parasite to me, I draw back quickly too. Yes, we need friends in our lives, but we must not get attached to people who will make life difficult for us. I don't base my criteria based on different beliefs or tradition, no, anybody is welcomed.
I remember back then in school, when I had just resumed as a newbie, how I got my first friend — and it was magical. I was in class when a guy and his sister(I initially thought she's his girlfriend) suddenly rushed into the hall, and the sister walked up to me to politely request some lecture handouts that had already been taught. I gave her the ones I had, thinking she was the one who wanted to use them, but little did I know she wasn’t even a member of my department. She was asking on behalf of her brother, and things just clicked from there. She handed her brother over to me to look after. She acted so maturely, like someone ahead of us, but I was even more surprised when I found out that she was also a newbie like us, only in another department. I and the guy became very good friends from the time we started school till the time we graduated — that’s a whole five years of unbroken friendship — and the friendship is still very much intact till today.
Also, I have had friends that started nicely, but along the line, certain weird characteristics began to play out either from the friend’s side or due to glitches happening at both ends, and we just had to let go. When this happens, I don’t stress it. It’s obvious that we are no longer compatible for friendship, and I just let things go.
Thanks for reading.