Back on track. My Actifit Diary: June 16 2026

in Actifit7 days ago

A productive day at last again. Very much so. I did end my work on an Excel-VBA command structure, with help from Gemini. A simple one, but I have no idea about coding, so it was fun to build it. It worked fine until Whatsapp decided that it was too many messages to numbers that didn’t have our contact saved, and restricted messaging for 24h. Well, no biggie. In the end, it would be the same amount of work as just running things through the broadcast system, as those need the number being saved, too. It was still fun to build.

I wrote a post today, too. It started out with a darker tone, but then swung into something more cheerful which I hadn’t expected. Doesn’t mean I’m fine. Meditation was rough today. Very rough. Like I drew a needle into a bubble of sadness that suddenly invaded me so completely that it hurt. I let it all out, cried for a while. Didn’t feel much better on the surface, but who knows.

Gym was fine, but my trousers are tearing everywhere now, and the new ones aren’t ready yet. Gotta make them hold up a little longer. I don’t mind, but people at the gym sometimes look at me funny. I hope they don’t mind, don’t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. Ellie came over afterwards, had me try a version of jogging trousers that she has. Funny enough, they seemed my size, although Ellie is quite a bit shorter than I. Turned out she wears the trousers at the waist, and I around the hip. Well, that explains it.

That’s almost it. Went for a couple of alcohol free beers with a friend who I haven’t seen in a while. We didn’t really connect this time, which is fine, and probably based on my emotional state. I’m not that social. It’ll pass, as all things shall. Thank you for reading, and have a good night!
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16/06/2026
14338
Walking,Gym,Daily Activity,Weight Lifting

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I'll have to check out your other post. When you talked about that sudden needle into a bubble. I recognize that. It has happened to me on a few occasions in the past. It is not a good feeling. But like you, I would let the motions flow. Usually back then though, I had my dog Bailey to talk to at nights. As that is when those feelings would usually fall over me. Hope you find someone to talk with, even if it is a pet.

It's quite interesting how that works. I try to be very conscious of my feelings, but I do have to wear a mask most of the day, with clients and such. There a few times that I can be myself. On top, I don't want to be wearing on others for being in the bad mood all the time.

That then makes me hold back, not fully living the emotions, leading to accumulations. I have to find a balance somehow, and hopefully will, soon.

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